tim roxborogh's travel bugs: 'that's not pollution!' tour guides who blatantly lie - custom design wine glasses
Sing for the joy of your holiday every week.
I will never forget Brian.
A bit like Trump, it's hard to say if Brian believes his lies.
Anyway, he was tireless in providing nonsense that was easily proven, and in the end, I kind of liked him.
Brian is a government.
When I was traveling to China a few years ago, he took care of me and several other journalists.
We didn't have Brian for the whole journey, but there was a Brian Hall of Fame so strange that it was clearly tattooed in my brain.
Quick disclaimer, Brian is not his real name, although I'm sure it's also British --
He gave us a nice name.
But given that this dear soul has a decent
I don't want to get him into trouble paying for government work.
So I chose "Brian" to protect this sweet sick liar.
"It's not actually pollution, it's just what the sky looks like when it's about to rain.
"When we drove into the cloudless Taiyuan *, it was a beautiful little gem of Brian, with a population of 3 million.
I have a weather forecast in front of me, which is sunny every day for several consecutive days.
We are in the suburbs of a major industrial metropolis, and Dear Brian doesn't want his overseas guests to think there might be some smog. Smog? In China? So he lied.
We looked out the window and commented on the brown stain hanging low on the sky and Superman --
As heard from the front of the minibus, Brian bugged in to correct our misconceptions.
In the end, Brian's biggest concern has nothing to do with the discovery by Western writers that there might be slight air --
In his home country, the quality problem is more "Oh my God, I'm afraid these white people will get drunk and die and I'll be fired.
"There is a custom in China that hosts provide alcoholic drinks to their guests at dinner without asking them what they want first.
Or at least it seems like a custom when we are there.
For Brian, this means purchasing the lowest alcohol drink known to humans in order not to break customs.
We had a great dinner, quite high --end, lazy-susan-
We were taken to our round table and Brian frantically collected all the wine glasses and put them on the table next to them.
When asked what he was doing, he said: "The restaurant is running out of wine. " Hmmm . . .
Who needs wine when Brian connects you to 1.
Six cents of alcoholic beer, though?
Then when we went to Datong. It was mid-
Traveling and getting along well with the team, we decided to end our close relationship with a round of karaoke.
Unfortunately, it was a major mistake to seek Brian's advice on where to find a karaoke bar, as the minibus was told that Datong was not only cursed that there was no karaoke bar, this is the kind of town where you might suffer a violent machete-
If you dare to walk down the street, an attack will be launched.
Brian's logic is a bit confusing here, because apparently according to an instruction, while ensuring the safety of his team, it is possible to paint China with the most positive eye, in order to protect us, he sacrificed the reputation of the whole city. Heroic.
It wasn't until the next morning that we found out that our hotel had its own karaoke bar, which was fantastic.
The city without karaoke has one in our hotel.
You took our rights, Brian.
What is a machete-
Every corner of the street is lurking waving gangsters?
We haven't seen anything in five months.
Brian also insists that the shops that walk to the corner do not exist.
In short, we had a very brilliant time in China.
For the record, it's cleaner and more natural and beautiful than I thought.
Brian, you have nothing to worry about.
* The air quality in Taiyuan has been greatly improved over the past decade, with stricter regulations and cleaning measures.
Tim Roxborogh hosts Newstalk roxborosneport ZB's group and blog last weekend.